Why Did the Chickens Cross the Road?

For this week, a little whimsy…

(photo by Erik_Karits @ pixabay.com)

Ulysses M. Rooster lived a life of liberation on the west side of highway 9 in Beaverton. He had escaped the coop the previous year, along with his girlfriend Penelope Henpecker. Together they fled into the lovely, sheltered forest adjacent to the farm. There, they had the freedom to roam around and at nighttime, they made a warm little love nest inside a hollow log where it was warm and dry.

The wheat fields were close enough that early every morning they scurried there to gather enough seed for the day and would return before the farmer awoke. They carried small pouches made of salal leaves, like little grain baskets in their beaks, and filled them up to take home to the forest.

Ulysses was very happy with Penelope, but he had one great regret. He had left behind his twin brother Horatio P. Rooster in the coop. He missed his brother terribly, so he made it his mission to liberate him. Late one night, he told Penelope it was time and set out for the farm.

When he got there, all was quiet and dark inside the farmhouse. Ulysses went first to the framer’s tool shed and flew up onto his bench. There, he retrieved in his beak a tiny chisel with which to pry back the chicken wire fence around the coop. He flew down and went to the same corner from which he had earlier escaped. Carefully inserting the chisel under the corner of wire, he used all his strength to pry it up wide enough for his brother to slip through. Then he called out, “Horatio, Horatio!”

Horatio woke up and immediately recognized his brother’s cluck. He flew towards him and they embraced warmly. Horatio followed his brother’s instructions and together they pried the wire back down so the farmer would suspect nothing. Ulysses also carefully returned the chisel to the tool bench. Off they ran into the night, as fast as their little clawed toes would take them.

After staying awake until the wee hours catching up on all their news, Horatio settled in for a long nap with his brother and Penelope. They would live happily in polygamous union, the two husbands and one wife.

When the weather became cooler and the earth turned towards autumn, the little family were shocked and dismayed to arrive at the wheat field one morning to find it all mown down.

“Whatever shall we do?” cried Horatio.

Penelope had an idea because she was the smartest.

“I heard from Innocent H. Clucker that the farmer across highway 9 has a big red barn and a silo filled with grain stored for the winter. If we go there, we can find shelter for the winter inside the hayloft and gather food from the silo overflow pile.”

They agreed with this plan, gathered their meagre belongings in their salal baskets, and headed out in the wee hours of the next morning. When they got to highway 9, they stopped cold as the farmer, who was up earlier than usual, rolled past on some huge monster with four wheels. They ducked down into the tall grass to hide. After he had passed, scared for their lives, they made a run for it. They found the red barn and were thrilled to discover no owls had taken up residence inside. So, they made it their humble home and lived there very happily. And that is why the chickens crossed the road.